For reasons all too apparent, I have been thinking about Hunter Thompson over the last few days. We are in a time of profound political weirdness - the shuffling, overheated summer, when people flock to cooler climes and politicians cast about for something meaningful to do. Of course, as it is mere months after an election, there is very little to do.
Yes, the opposition is full in the throes of denial and anger and dreams of political retribution. The kvetching takes on an apocalyptic tone, as they try to convince the nation that they have just made some type of tragic mistake and the ship of state is heading toward the rocky cliffs, the crew enticed by the siren's song. All will be lost if they don't seize the wheel.
But honestly, nobody outside of the true believers in the opposition camp can get all that jazzed up about their screams of impending doom and destruction. Mayhap the dire economic news will bring the true believers a few more sympathetic ears, but by God, its summer, and it is hard to get up a head of steam over some vague menace in the face of real hardship. If Obama can stumble into a moderate economic recovery folks won't care if he is the reincarnation of Karl Marx, they will simply be happy that they have a job that pays the bills. If the economy tanks, it won't matter if people love Obama and think him the best president since Lincoln - they will turn him out of office without thinking. Simple, really. This is not a difficult prediction to make.
But nobody buys the nonsense that the republic is failing, or even falling apart, or that Obama is purposely trying to destroy America. Folks look around, see the unemployment rates climbing and their pensions (if they have one) shrinking, and simply want somebody to do something to halt the slide and maybe even turn it around a little. If the economy is heading up in 2012, the Republicans could run a combination of Ike and Reagan and they would still get beaten like a rented mule.
Which leads to the blazingly, profoundly, deliriously abject strangeness of the last week.
Gov. Mark Sanford (R-Harlequin) not only admitted to an affair, but dumbfoundingly decided to wax poetic about his soul-mate in Argentina. He didn't stop there, he then proceeded to babble about wanting to fall back in love with his wife. This, clearly not being sufficient weirdness, then admitted that he had skated close to the line of infidelity with another vague number of women. Every time he spoke with the media he revealed ever more of his tragic-romantic soul. It would be touching, if it weren't so deeply weird to watch a middle-aged man spin out heart-sick longing that would embarrass teenage diarists the world over.
That said, it bothers me very little. I am not going to get on a soapbox about his theoretical hypocrisy (he went after Clinton big time - but really, Clinton was all walking libidinal idiocy, it was easy to take a few whacks) because I tend to believe that most 'moral' politicians will reveal hypocrisy sooner rather than later. They really can't help it - you repress that much and it will spill out someplace. It really is just a matter of time. The more bellicose the politician regarding moral turpitude, the more spectacular the wipeout.
Still, the Sanford saga is just darn strange. It wreaks of something tacky and sordid. Of course, it didn't help that any number of folks ran out and published abject foolishness about how delightful his 'love' was, how splendiferous his devotion to this new soul-mate was, how it was all so achingly heroic and admirable. Please.
As the political world was steering into clearer waters (aided and abetted by the death of Michael Jackson - which should have been a sign that more bizarre tales were yet afoot, not unlike interpreting bird-signs in Ancient Greece, this death was clearly a sign that the world was about to take another right turn into the outer limits.
Which, of course, was fulfilled in the shambling, disjointed, near manic speech Gov. Sarah Palin (R-The Outer Limits) gave on Friday, wherein she announced that she was not only not going to run for reelection in 2010, but that, in fact, she was going to resign.
What? What in heaven's name?
Her supporters immediately hailed this as a brilliantly left-field strategy for kicking off her presidential campaign. My immediate thought about their spin - you are dazzlingly round the bend. The immediate thought about Palin? Idiot. In the old Greek sense of the word - one who does not participate in the life of the community and the assembly.
She quit. Really, it is as simple as that. She quit. Dropped out. Cut and run. "Run away!" Buggered off. Chickened out. 'Bravely ran away.'
Yep, Brave Sir Robin, indeed.
I can't even imagine in what fever-swampish thought process would lead one to believe that a possible run for the presidency would be served by bailing on the first term of your only real elected office. (Don't start with the whole mayor of Wasilla thing. I have known small town mayors, a decidedly unsavory lot, for the most part. Or more blindly idealistic than even me. Either way, this is not an accomplishment that stirs the hearts of men. It is nice, in that quaint and slightly deranged Wooley's Bar for breakfast kind of way. Yeah, the eggs are decent, but, my goodness, don't think too intently about who made them, or where, and with what utensils.)
Ahem. Where was I?
"Ripping on yet another Republican. Mindlessly shredding a politician who decided that you yammering liberal-elitist types were essentially destroying her family."
Oh, stop. Please. This particular politician would wade through hip-deep broken glass if it meant she could climb up to the next rung of political success. Don't kid yourself. This is no shrinking violet lamenting the way that the mean ole' media has been harassing her. Honestly. She is a politician with a keen desire to vault to the big prize, and seems all too willing to do whatever is necessary to get there. (In this, she is not unlike a great many other politicians. Oh, no, she is not rare in this compulsive desire to be at the center of attention in order to get to the big chair. It has afflicted a great many, and she is neither the first nor the last to want to drink deeply from this particular cup of infamy.)
So. Why quit? It makes no logical sense.
You want to warm the big chair, finish your term in Alaska and then hit the road. Make some smart, snappy speeches every now and then. Brush up on policy. Comfort yourself with the thought that Mitt Romney and Haley Barbour are your main competitors. You were castigated as a lightweight - so, go out and finish off your term in a blaze of depth and complexity. Do something startlingly difficult. Most of all, have some flipping patience and stick to your job. Don't give people the thought that you may actually be some kind of ADD addled punk who couldn't finish a gig.
Is there some ugly scandal coming down the pike? Hard to tell. Might it be some dread illness in the family? Nah, doesn't seem to be the case, that kind of speech would have been much different, far more noble, one that draws people in and allows them to support and offer sympathy. Palin's speech on Friday was light-years away from that.
No, the vibe was decidedly unhinged. It was deeply, profoundly weird. Even the Lt. Gov. seemed completely perplexed by the entire event, unsure whether or not he should be witnessing the train-wreck occurring mere paces away. He wanted to avert his eyes, but the ghastly fascination was too much. That's okay, we were all in the same boat.
So, in a week, two strong contenders for the Republican nomination in 2012 went down in flames, leaving a trail of bizarre stories, and far too many questions.
Of course, I don't think its over. Not yet. Not completely. This worm is going to turn again before it is all over. We are now entering into the brutally hot months of July and August when the heat really starts to bake the brain, and the storms and hurricanes start to unleash their wanton destruction. These are the moments when the politicians don't think anybody is paying attention and start to go off at right-angles on us, offering brilliant schemes to ferret out the Illuminati or the last vestiges of the Knights Templar, and tying it all to the credit markets and poppy production in Afghanistan. They will offer furtive speculation on the private habits of Syrian hamsters and what this means for the Dow. They will start to offer stone-cold proof for Obama having a hand in the Kennedy assassination. They will blame Reagan and Paul Krugman for making the banks fail.
This is going to be a weird summer. Palin and Sanford will seem normal by September. Not that it will save either one - a quitter and a doomed romantic hero. Yikes. Nonetheless, both are finished, no matter what kind of loopy spin jobs their most loyal sycophants might want to peddle.
Yep, it is in the air. Buckle up, people, this is going to go out there this summer.
Recent Comments